Holidays are just around the corner. With the upcoming holidays, there are a lot
of different events that come about. The first event on campus was the
Thanksgiving buffet. This was on Wednesday, November 18th. The
buffet was for everyone to celebrate Thanksgiving on campus before Thanksgiving
break.
“ The buffet was really worth the money and was the best
food I have ever had at Washburn,” Said Logan Runnebaum, a freshman Nursing
major.
The buffet was 10 dollars at the door or nine dollars in
advance. It was for all students and faculty. The food, was all traditional
Thanksgiving food. Some of he food included was, Turkey, ham potatoes and cream
corn. For desert there were a few different kinds of pie. The pumpkin pie was
everyone’s favorite.
The buffet was a great hit with all students who attended.
There was an abundance of people who attended. All of the seats were full from
the start to the end of the buffet. It
is the best buffet that Washburn offers all year.
“I always miss the buffet and really wish I could have
attended it.” Said David Cox a mass media senior.
Thanksgiving break starts Wednesday, November 25th
and class resume Monday November 30th. With holiday cooking and black Friday coming
up it is nice to just be able to go and eat at a buffet and not have to do any
of the work.
With the buffet being such a hit I feel that they should do
more buffet like this in the future. Maybe a different buffet every month would
be really nice and keep more people on campus. Also it makes student feel like
they get their moneys worth. There are a lot of people on campus who feel that
the food is over priced.
Great story. You spelled dessert, like desert so change that.
ReplyDeleteCool story. You need to fix your punctuation and grammatical errors for your quotes, such as "said Logan Runnebaum" and "I could have attended it,” said David Cox. Also there should be a comma after "class resume Monday, November" ...
ReplyDeleteIn the sentence, "The buffet was 10 dollars at the door or nine dollars in advance..." you need to change the dollar amount to $10 and $9. According to AP style you should always use numerals for money. I agree with Kelly on the quote; change the period to a comma and lowercase the word "said." On the date "November 30th," change to "Nov. 30" Otherwise, good story!
ReplyDeleteAll your dates, according to AP Style, need to be abbreviated when followed by a date. You do this several times through the story. For every quotation use this format, "I always miss the buffet and really wish I could have attended it,” said David Cox, senior mass media major. / “The buffet was really worth the money and was the best food I have ever had at Washburn,” said Logan Runnebaum, freshman nursing major. According to AP Style amounts of money need to be listed as $9 or $10 instead of nine dollars or ten dollars.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like everyone else found the mechanical errors. Your story doesn't flow very well. I would limit the number of times you refer to the buffet as a "hit."
ReplyDeleteI love how I made it into this story, Justin. However, I don't remember giving permission ;) #JK. I think all o the edits have already been pointed out, interesting article that made me hungry. #win
ReplyDeleteVery informative story, Justin. I would suggest making the months abbreviated that follow with a number and putting a comma after it. Never use the th after the number, because of AP style. Also, sometimes it does not flow at points, so just read through again. Other than that, great job!
ReplyDeleteDon't use "th" after 18. just 18.
ReplyDeleteGreat job! The word Said shouldn't be capitalized where it says the quote from Mr. Cox, other than that good job Justin!!
ReplyDeleteThere are some spelling and grammar errors such as desert should be dessert and the dates. I was unaware of this Thanksgiving buffet and I'm glad you are bringing it to my attention.
ReplyDeleteSmall errors here and there. Good job! Made me hungry after readying it!
ReplyDeleteMinor things but overall a great job! Keep in mind "overpriced" is one word.
ReplyDeletegood story! one thing I want mention is lowercase "Said“ in this sentence “ The buffet was really worth the money and was the best food I have ever had at Washburn,” Said Logan Runnebaum.
ReplyDelete